They say “laughter is the best medicine” so what better than a chortle over a collection of some of the strange and funny things Doctor’s have scribbled about patients in their notes … You never know, maybe the Doc has said them about you too.
Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
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On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely.
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Discharge status: alive but without permission.
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The patient refused an autopsy.
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The patient has no past history of suicides.
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Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.
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Patient’s past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40-pound weight gain in the past three days.
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She is numb from her toes down.
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The skin was moist and dry.
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Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
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Patient was alert and unresponsive
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She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
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I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
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Patient has two teenage children but no other abnormalities.
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Skin: Somewhat pale but present.
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Patient was seen in consultation by Dr-, who felt we should sit on the abdomen, and I agree.
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By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart stopped, and he was feeling better.
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The patient was in his usual state of good health until his aeroplane ran out of gas and crashed.
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When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.
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Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing.
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The patient expired on the floor uneventfully.
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She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December.
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The patient left the hospital feeling much better except for her original complaints.
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She was divorced last April. No other serious illness.
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Apparently the mother resented the fact that she was born in her forties.
