Colemanballs – a term coined by Private Eye magazine to describe verbal gaffes perpetrated by (usually British) sports commentators.

David Coleman is a British national treasure. During his time as a BBC sports commentator he frequently got completely carried away with hillarious consequences. Here’s a round up of some of this lovely man’s heat of the moment gaffs. Plus to prove the spirit of Colemanballs is not dead in today’s British sport commentary we include some hillarious comtemporary commentator quotes and quips from his worthy successors in the art of “foot in mouth”…


(At the velodrome) The front wheel crosses the finish line, closely followed by the back wheel.
David Coleman
 
We estimate, and this isn’t an estimation, that Greta Waltz is 80 seconds behind.
David Coleman
 
That’s the fastest time ever run – but it’s not as fast as the world record.
David Coleman
 
What disappointed me was that we didn’t play with any passion. I’m not disappointed, you know, I’m just disappointed.
Kevin Keegan
 
The new season will be all about scoring more goals than the opposition.
Alvin Martin
 
Chile have three options – they could win or they could lose.
Kevin Keegan
 
I never comment on referees and I’m not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat.
Ron Atkinson
 
We now have exactly the same situation as we had at the start of the race, only exactly the opposite.
Murray Walker
 
Steve is going for the pink ball – and for those of you who are watching in black and white, the pink is next to the green.
Ted Lowe – Snooker Commentator
 
Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing – but none of them serious.
Alan Minter
 
He dribbles a lot and the opposition don’t like it – you can see it all over their faces.
Ron Atkinson