Below are some maintenance complaints and problems made by pilots from the Australian airline QANTAS…and the rather cheeky responses the engineers and ground crew gave.
P – The problem, as logged by the pilot. S – The solution, as logged by the engineers.
|P||–||Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement.|
|S||–||Almost replaced left inside main tyre.|
|P||–||Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.|
|S||–||Autoland not installed on this aircraft.|
|P||–||Something loose in cockpit.|
|S||–||Something tightened in cockpit.|
|P||–||Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.|
|P||–||DME volume unbelievably loud.|
|S||–||Volume set to more believable level.|
|P||–||Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.|
|S||–||That’s what they are there for.|
|S||–||IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.|
|P||–||Suspected crack in windscreen.|
|S||–||Suspect you’re right.|
|P||–||Number 3 engine missing.|
|S||–||Engine found on right wing after brief search.|
|P||–||Aircraft handles funny.|
|S||–||Aircraft warned to ‘Straighten up, Fly Right, and Be Serious.’|
|P||–||Target radar hums.|
|S||–||Reprogrammed target radar with words.|
|P||–||Mouse in cockpit.|
You must be logged in to post a comment.